God knows how much I still want to pursue my dream.
Photo lifted from http://ajygatdula.blogspot.com/2012/06/living-without-uste.html
Whenever I see UST in pictures, news or in real life… The feeling of awe never fails to leave my system. Yes, even after three years I would still transfer to this university in a heartbeat.
Tanungin lang ako ng daddy ko ng, “Gusto mong mag-UST?” Promise, aasikasuhin ko agad agad ng papers.
But of course, life isn’t that easy. As much as I want that to happen, I don’t know how I could make it happen. I don’t know if it’s too late since I’ve put on so much time and effort right now in UP.
I am terrified because I might not feel the sense of achievement and happiness if ever I graduate from my current course. Sure, I would take so much pride in what I have accomplished, but would I feel fulfilled? Nakakatakot.
Around this time, last year, I went back to UST. I am excited and nervous once again. Excited because I’ll be seeing my dream school again, and nervous because I’ll be seeing my dream school again. What if hindi na ganun ka-glorious ‘yung feeling ‘pag nandun ako? What if nawala na ‘yung sparks na nafeel ko ‘nung high school ako? But then that would be a looooot easier for me in my current situation kasi yay parang infatuation lang na-feel ko for UST.
When I went there though….
Iba pa rin. May sparks pa rin kami ng USTe.
LAHAT. ‘Yung uniform, ‘yung home-y feeling doon, ‘yung students… lahat. Iba talaga ang tama ko sa UST.
Nung nandoon ako, iniisip ko na siguro kung nandoon ako nag-aaral sobrang sipag kong mag-aral, ‘yung tipong nag-eenjoy ako ng sobra kasi ginagawa ko kung ano ‘yung gusto ko talaga. Siguro matataas grades ko dahil sa pag-aaral ko ng sobra, tapos siguro ang sarap ng feeling pagkatapos kong magcollege.
Gustong gusto kong malaman ‘yung feeling.
Sa totoo lang, parang gusto kong pumasok doon kahit one week lang para malaman ‘yung feeling. Kasi nasa point na ako na hindi ko na alam kung anong gusto ko talaga. Kasi what if lumipat nga ako tapos hindi na pala ‘yun ang gusto ko?
I didn’t know that my decision three years ago would cause so much conflict within myself right now.
But if I were given a chance to live my dream, syempre gagawin ko pa rin ang lahat para dito.
Sucks to have so much passion for something you can’t have.
I guess what I’m trying to say here is that if you’re an incoming college student, make the right choice. Don’t settle for something you’re trying to love. Go for something na gusto mo na talagang gawin matagal na.
If I was an author, I’d go into bookstores and find the shelf with my books, randomly sign one, and put it back on the shelf to be sold.
The truth is everything is not okay. Sobrang gulo ng lahat - mostly caused by me. I don’t know what had happened pero bigla na lang nagbago ang lahat. I wish I know what changed so I could at least fix it. Pero guilty ako, ako naman ang may kasalanan ng lahat.
Photo not mine.
Whenever I’m having a writer’s block, and have gone to a state wherein I feel like I’m not inspired to write, I go check my favorite bloggers’ blogs. So i think that maybe sharing my favorite blogs would give you some inspiration as well.
Ma’am Dewmaine Sales-Ladaga of Momsterteacher.com.
Who she is: Called her Ma’am Dewmaine since she was my UPCAT review teacher when I was an incoming fourth year high school student (and now I’m an incoming third year college student so how long ago was that) but I wasn’t a reader of her blog back then. I don’t know how I came across her blog but I just did. Back then, she has her blog on Wordpress.
Why I love her blog: I love Ma’am Dewmaine’s blog because she’s fashionable, she has a very cute son and I love reading about their family.
From her Wardrobe Diaries to managing their business (they are actually the owner of Brain Train) to taking care of her son, I just look up to her in every aspect. A part of me wants to be like her when I reach my twenties to thirties - accomplished yet independent.
Timothy Tiah of timothytiah.com.
Who he is: Oh you know, just the co-founder of Nuffnang (the ad service I have up above my blog’s header). I actually found his site back when I was in high school. Back then, memes were in rage so when he proposed to his wife using different memes, I didn’t have to think twice watching it and researching some more about them. Here’s their proposal video.
Why I love his blog: Back then, I loved his blog because of their wedding preparations and posts about his fiancee, their wedding proper, how they overcame his wife’s pre-eclampsia and finally, having a baby and becoming a dad. I love his “Things Fatty and Shorty say” which composed of the couple’s funny conversations and stuff.
Audrey Ooi-Tiah of fourfeetnine.com.
Who she is: She’s the girl Timothy proposed too. Yup, blogger couples. :—-)
Why I love her blog: I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HER BLOG BECAUSE SHE’S SO FUNNY AND COOL. She also posts OOTDs and I find her style very cute. God, I would like to meet her in person. I loved her posts about their wedding preparations (she blogged it in a more detailed fashion than Tim did) from her gown to the decorations to the program and all… I loved her wedding so much I had it as an inspiration for my debut. Her wedding’s theme was the movie Up! (same as mine) and she had all her guests in pastel colors (same as mine), so yeah… I really loved it.
Then she began talking about her married life, pregnancy and her son. I love Audrey so much I even love her advertorials wtf.
So there you go! I’m going to post more blogs when I have the time. :—-)
Hi, sorry for this kinda late reply. That, I don’t know. But why don’t you go try it out? Indicate your age on your resume and see if they’ll contact you. I think if they do, it’d be a great sign or something. :-)
We’re working some things out. :-) But hey, thanks for being a regular reader! <3
There was someone I was with during our orientation. She was only 17 years old and she willt be turning 18 on November, some of the personnel who oriented us took note of her age but I guess they let her in since I see her working at EK already. She has an agency though (4th Dimension Agency) so I’m not sure if that helped her a bit. The thing with agencies is that they are the ones who screen applicants first then immediately refer them to the Human Resource department of EK (I don’t have an agency btw).
I guess this is a nice job for a working student. I am thinking of extending my stay even if classes resume, but I’m still not sure about that.
Right now, there are two shifts. 10:00 AM - 7:00 PM and 12:30 PM - 9:30 PM. Mostly, I do overtime but it’s not much of a hassle since it’s really fun. :) The schedule will depend on the park’s schedule, however. Sometimes, companies reserve the park so the opening and closing hours are earlier than the usual. :)
Hi Nadia! You’re welcome. :-) Thanks for following back and for reading my posts. I really appreciate it. :)
I hate myself for making rash decisions most of the times… then I regret making them after quite some time. It’s one of those “you change your mind like a girl changes clothes” moments in life I want to hate myself.
Or maybe it’s just that I don’t know what I should do anymore. At one point, I want to be independent and be this person who can take care of herself. But there are times when I want someone who could listen and understand, and that someone will be there with full certainty.
But yet again, I think that this time, like every other time before, I need to learn that I will just be the only one who will take care of myself.
Received my first ever paycheck last Monday.
And did it feel good.
I NOW HAVE SOMETHING BRAG ABOUT YAY! I worked hard for this. I found myself an employer and was the one who got all the requirements needed (no help from my parents, just directions and some starting money). I feel like I’m being so productive right now.
I am happy not only because of my paycheck but also because I am seriously enjoying work so far.
So what do I exactly do?
I work at Enchanted Kingdom as a cashier. I was assigned as one of the cashiers for the concessionaire rides (not EK-owned). So basically these rides require additional charges so that’s why I’m there. During my first week of work, I was assigned at the Bouncing Boulderville booth. I had fun at that booth since work was very light and minimal since the ticket only costs 50 pesos so I don’t have to worry about giving out change or making errors, and we have a manual ticketing system and original receipts aren’t required, I just give them out upon guests’ request or whenever they’re using out discounts (you see manual OR’s are hard to do since we need to compute for the VAT shiz you see on OR’s).
I honestly had fun working here since this ride was made to cater for kids.
Photo lifted from: http://revamp.enchantedkingdom.ph/bouncing-boulders/
Last Friday, I was assigned to the XPP: Xtreme Paintball booth. This was a bit challenging because I have to do manual OR. The guests were also challenging because people who play paintball are mostly guys or people my age so I was a bit intimidated.
Photo lifted from: http://wikimapia.org/5036260/Xtreme-Paintball-Philippines
Last weekend, I worked at the Animal Encounter booth. So the show is open for everyone but one has to pay if he/she wants to have his/her picture taken with Boomer (the phyton). Anyway, I also had fun working here since I get to watch the show, see the animals they bring out and see guests who have their pictures taken scream their hearts out when they hold Boomer.
But this is, by far, the most challenging because I have to write the VATs blah blah on the receipt for every guest who will avail so wtf. There was a guide so I just have to copy but the problem is I write so slow and guests were pouring wtf.
But last Saturday, my supervisor already gave me the swipe card for the POS (Point of Sales) Machine.
If there’s anything I don’t like it’d be online purchasing or purchasing using computers. And this is my access to the POS (the one fast foods use to get orders). I am scared to operate since I don’t know how to use it yet and I might commit errors wtf. :-(
And of course, I wouldn’t enjoy work if it weren’t for my co-workers. They are mostly around their twenties so it wasn’t hard to get along with them. Coupled with cashiers were the ride attendants and ride operators and they are fun to be with, as well. :-)
Anyway, if you want to be a part of Enchanted Kingdom, they are continuously hiring! Right now we are in need of man power. It is a fun experience and they are very flexible when it comes to schedule. Students have their option of working on weekends (weekenders as we call it) I MEAN HOW CAN YOU FIND A JOB LIKE THAT???
Which one? Yung recent ba? Na-feel ko lang na medyo ni-rush ko yung post when it deserves more time to write. :)